How Much They Hate It? Very!

*PINCHED NOTE*: Ya’ll may or may not (more so the latter) have noticed I’ve been a bit absent from this here eCrib. I have a good reason, tho! And it rhymes with Trip Benzy. Basically, I was over here hustling hard on my script game and managed to spit out a feature script (my 4th one in total!) in 30 days! Something I’ve never done before so quickly! So yeah, that had all my attention, Pinchers, but I’m back to give ya’ll some pinch-tention. Trust me, this cutesy “pinch” thing will get old soon. And I’ll STILL do it. Because I’m cornier than a husk.

Could this post feature ANY other picture? No, rhetorical answerer, the answer is no.

Hate.

If John Lennon was alive today (R.I.P. btw), he’d probably have an epic Twitter beef with 21st century “rappers” and “goons” about his infamous song title, “All You Need Is Love.”

Or at least that’s how it would happen in the delusional world called my imagination. Oooh! Imagining! Something else the late John Lennon was a proponent of.

The theory/act of hating (or… “Haterism” as I like to call it) has always intrigued me. Especially nowadays, where “hating” or “having haters” has the ability to trump any talk of love in common conversations. Le shock and horror!

There are a few components of Haterism that particularly… intrigue me for lack of a better word. “Intrigue me” can be loosely substituted with “cause me to make several o_O or -_O or e_O faces”, by the way.

1. Haters = Success. Oh? I totally get that negativity is a form of adrenaline and inspiration toward becoming successful, but I can’t help but think that this adage has gone a tad bit too far. In fact, there is an ACRONYM for the term, “haters.”

H.A.T.E.R.S. – Having Anger Toward Everyone Reaching Success.

And ya’ll KNOW ish has gone too far when there is acronym made from it. I’m kinda uncomfy with some folks’ implication that true success is measured from some douchebag that pisses in your Kool-aid AND it only gives undeserved ninjas carte blanche to use this as a means to confirmation of said success.

Which only brings me to…

2. Hating In Mirror Are Falser Than It Appears. Probably my biggest pet peeve regarding Haterism abuse is this:

FOLKS WHO HAVE LESS THAN ZERO THINGS TO HATE ON CLAIM TO HAVE HATERS.

THEE number one requirement to have haters is to have something to hate on. So, booboo on your 20in rims on a Honda Civic, Sir. Or booboo on your weave made from virgin molerats, Ma’am. Which of course, I have to get on my segway to segue to…

3. Legit Criticism ≠ Hating. Liken it to folks who call EVERY single thing “epic.” The very definition of “epic” loses all of the value because it isn’t distinct anymore. Same concept with hating. Not every single bout of criticism can be deemed as hating. I ain’t sorry bout 2004 nor am I sorry about that. You just gotta face it, sometimes the criticism ain’t coming outta nowhere. There actually is some basis behind it and it may be something to think about. Hell, it may be — gasp — constructive, and said to inspire you to do better because that person knows you can. PERISH the thought. And I’d also include the note to certain celeb stans that anything other than “glowing-gasm 100% positive comments” ain’t hating by default, but that would also require the assumption that they have sense. And I don’t have that assumption ability.  So, I won’t include it.

Even beyond the above ones I’ve mentioned, one of the most interesting and intriguing aspects of Haterism has been the idea that…

4. Hating Was Established On Venus. Meaning that, basically, hating is primarily a “chick thing.”

… JIGGER WHAT?! Allow me to express the feeling I have for that thought in the best way I know how: this.

Oh, because you happen to witness our hateration in this dancery in a more public manner, that means it’s the only proof of existence? Tell that to subtle racism. Anyway.

What I find more interesting is that ANY expression of a man commenting on another man is deemed “gay” (if my eyes rolled any more, they’d also rock), which automatically cancels out any public discourse. Welp, peer pressure! Doesn’t mean it ain’t happening, though. Besides, ain’t Drake slander ya’ll version of “she think she cute?”

Ok, I’m totally being tongue-in-cheek with that comparison. OR AM I???

But yeah, for some reason “women hating other women” is some grandiose issue that we only suffer from. On a whole ‘nother level, I have a feeling men kinda get off on women hating other women. Several months ago, there was some rumor on the internets about Idris Elba possibly dating a white chick. Now, I haven’t actually confirmed this to be true or found any updates… I was too busy living the #shruglife and continuing my leisurely hobby that consists of lusting after his pictures. But, when this rumor broke out, I expected to see TONS of women threatening to leap out of their desk chair to their death, but what I saw most of?

Men HA-ha-ing to all the Black chicks on some Nelson Muntz mess. Like, most of my Twitter timeline was FILLED with men Dougie-ing in celebration that all the Black Womenz were gonna go NUTS and hate on this hypothetical white chick. OR maybe they were glad the Woman-Idol wasn’t checking for them (because yes, dating ONE or even several non-Black chicks means you don’t like Black chicks at all -_-) because these men were always… I don’t know… hating on him? Awwwww, of course not!

Oh, and by the way, since this post is already long enough, I TRULY hope that by saying “men” or “women” is automatically assumed that I don’t mean ALL men or ALL women, because having to specify the exact number of (wo)men (separating them by race, class, height, weight, location, etc.) would take a whole bunch of time and eff up a sister’s word count like a mug. *smize*

Pinchers, what you think about Haterism in general? Has it now evolved to simple B.S. or is there still some validity to it… at all? Speak on it!

Love ya like Tupac hologram jokes love to come back as much as Tupac,

Cheekie