It’s been a long time, I shouldn’t have left you. Without some foolery to fall out to.
Blah blah blah screenwriting taking up my whole life blah. Let’s get right to it, my lovely Pinchers!
I think I’ve mentioned this before, but I love intelligent ignance. It’s better than plain intelligence and better than plain ignance. It’s this fusion of two things I love that brings me life.
Let’s get nostalgic. Ya’ll remember Reading Rainbow, right? Duh, of course you do. Anything else is scientifically impossible. Plus, Levar Burton (in his awesomeness) will never let you forget. It’s such a beloved show because it had kids flying twice as high, presumably higher than a butterfly in the sky.
And for those of us who believe children are our future, reading is fundamental, especially for the kiddies. And we try to get them to read so they’re not… ignant.
What if I told you that the VERY hot mess that personifies NOT reading was combined with reading? Think it cancels each other out? Hmmm…
Take a look, in a book… at my live commentary:
0:00 – YES, you read that right. It’s DMX infused with Reading Rainbow. Shenanigans SHALL ensue.
0:02 – K, DMX lettin’ ya’ll know that this is that real shit, yo. Because reading IS real. A reading rainbow might not be (O_O I’m just playin’ kids, it IS real… then again you shouldn’t be reading this, get out grown folks bidness!), but reading?! That’s a real issue. Because the internet will SHOLE show you that… well, it’s a fundamental exercise that more people need to participate in. Oop!
0:06 – DMX doing his hype growl because he obviously excited about literacy.
0:09 – AWWWWW snap, you know it’s bout to be a party when DMX says, “COME ON!”… I already know this joint could legit be at the club. o_____O
0:11 – For some reason, I see “I can go twice as high” as something… different with this DMX ad-libs fusion. Different as in… I think of drugs. I have no clue why. -_-
0:13 – LMAO… “take a look… nigga!” See, this is where DMX tryna speak to the hood. You know how folks speak in the language of the community in order to get through to them? This what DMX is doing. I bet he got their attention… and yours too.
0:17 – YOU THINK IT’S A GAME?! Tell ‘em, DMX! Because if you think Reading Rainbow is a game, then you will lose. At life.
0:23 – “I can go anywhere… suck my…” HOL’ UP. Did he just tell ya’ll to suck his SAW-SEEGE? LMAO, I can go anywhere indeed. Is DMX’s peen in Google Maps? It’s prolly on 69 S Deez Nuts Blvd or somethin’.
0:29 – HERE WE GO AGAIN. Ish finna get extra hype now.
0:34 – “I can be anything…. same ol’ shit, WHAT?!” ROFL, I feel like DMX is responding to the singer now. Like, oh we back at this part again? At the bridge? Just repeatin the same ol’ ish over and over, huh?
0:38 – There’s something SUPER hilarious with DMX sayin’ “my nigga” while this Ben Franklin mofo is onscreen right now. Wait… *looks at him pulling ship* that’s, like… Christopher “Smallpox” Columbus ain’t it? I need to read.
0:44 – DMX, you better DRILL in their head that this ain’t a game by asking rhetorical questions regarding whether it’s a game!
0:48 – WHAT’CHALL REALLY WAAAAANT AH AH. You want to READ that’s what. That’s the only answer.
0:51 – RIDE OR DIE. We just gone pretend “Ride” is code for “Read.” This makes sense.
So, how ya’ll like this Reading Rainbow Remix? Don’t ya’ll got this huge urge to go READ something?! I mean, other than this blog post you just read? Let’s go outside and ride the Reading Rainbow, Pinchers!
MEET ME OUTSIDE.
Lawd. Have a great weekend, ya’ll. You were missed. Foolery was missed.
Love ya like Romney loves snatching his own wig for $50,000 a plate,